He Proves Himself Trustworthy
The Lord your God in your midst,
The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17 NKJV
Having a third baby at age 37 was not in my plans, but here was this perfect little girl in my arms. When she was three weeks old, my aunt and uncle stopped overnight on their cross- country trip. Their campground was an hour away, but taking all three girls by myself to visit for the day shouldn’t be a big deal, right? The day was fun for the children, and I loved having time with my aunt.
I was exhausted after driving home and making dinner, giving baths, and doing the bedtime routine on my own, since my husband was out of town. Perfectionistic expectations were a burden I carried most of my life, and I felt their crushing weight that night. How would I have the energy to live out the days, months, and years ahead, creating the perfect picture I desired? I didn’t even have the energy to take a shower!
After getting the girls into bed, I curled up against the cushions of our extra-large recliner. I usually sat there with all my girls, but on this night, I sat alone. I closed my eyes and let the tears flow. I cried out to God as the reality of my need for His care crashed down on me. Living life according to my plan, under my own direction and power, wasn’t working. I needed help.
That was the moment I felt my Father’s arms holding me. He wrapped His arms around me as securely as I had held my precious baby girl earlier that evening. He soothed my aching heart and gave me the safety I needed to surrender my will to His. His peace replaced my panic as His presence comforted me in the darkness of my family room.
On that night, my Heavenly Father broke through to my stubborn heart with the truth that I could trust Him completely. I was safe and secure in His everlasting arms. Through my struggles with perfectionism and unrealistic expectations of myself and others, He gently led me to know that He really is God and I really am not.
I look back on that marker moment of thirty-two years ago and see how Abba has changed my heart with His love and grace. He has proven Himself trustworthy countless times as I recall my life verse, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV). And when I forget this truth, He patiently waits for me to remember His faithfulness.
Questions For Reflection:
What comfort does it bring you to know that your Heavenly Father desires to hold you, to comfort you, to heal you, and to bring you back to a right perspective of your struggles?
How does remembering that God is God help you lay down the desire to control your life and trust Him?